Thinking Out Loud, Volume CDXVI

When my daughter was a little girl, we subscribed to "Highlights Magazine" for her. It is a magazine for children, but she was a child, and she loved it! I remember one day she said to me, "I'm gonna keep getting "Highlights" even when I'm grown." I just smiled and didn't say anything, but I knew better, because she was thinking like a child. There was no way for her to think otherwise. Today she is an adult, and she thinks like an adult, but let's give it a little more thought. As an individual who has been around for more than six decades, I know how people think when they're in their 20s and 30s, because I've been there. What I don't know is how people think when they're in their 80s, because I've never been there. Are we really justified in being critical of someone who is older than we are, since we've never experienced life at their age? I wonder how many statements I've made to someone who is my elder, and he would just smile to himself because he understood my way of thinking would change over time. I sometimes do that now when I hear conversations of those who may be a decade or so younger than I am. My outlook on life has matured over time the same way my body has matured. Let me give you an example of what I'm talking about: I remember, as a young man, making the statement I was going to continue to follow all the latest hits on the radio as I aged so even as a senior citizen I would still enjoy listening to the same music as the young adults. Well, I can assure you that statement was coming from a mind that was much less mature than it is now, and my declaration didn't come to pass. None of us know when we will die, but as a sixty-two year old, I've had to come to grips with the fact that the time I have left on this earth is much less than the time I've been here, even though it doesn't seem like I've really been around very long. No doubt as I get even older, the imminence of death will become more of a reality in my mind. Unless a younger person is facing a terminal illness, those thoughts never enter their minds. Until we know how it feels to face the fact that death is just around the corner, maybe we should refrain from judging too harshly those who do know how it feels. It certainly has to affect anyone's way of thinking. If you're younger than I am, I may politely listen to you as you explain to me how I'm doing things all wrong, while in reality I'm letting your words roll off me like water off a duck's back. I will not be critical of you, however, because I've been there, and I've said the same things you're saying. Just a few weeks ago, we said goodbye to my father-in-law, a man I loved like my own dad and who was a vital part of my life for more than forty years, and we were there with him during his last few days and weeks of life. He was well aware of the fact his time on earth was over, and I couldn't help but wonder what was going on in his mind. I did see his way of thinking evolve over the decades. Although I hope to be around for several more years, I do understand, chances are, before too long, I'll have a pretty good idea of what he was thinking, because regardless of how much time I have left, my remaining time will seem like just a few days. I understand that now. As a young man, I never gave it a thought. Preston