It was a day that changed my life. Wait...let me rephrase that....it was a moment that changed my life. I don't remember exactly where I was when that moment happened, but I do remember that it was early September,1986, and I was driving my car, a white 1984 Buick Century. Just a couple weeks before, I had experienced for the first time that horrible feeling that almost every human alive has either already faced or will have to face...the death of a parent. In this instance, I had lost my dad, and as I drove down the highway that day trying so hard to erase the most recent memories of him as he lay in bed during those final days of life, I was hoping that my recollections of him would be of the happy times we had shared so many times, when he was in good health. Then the thought occurred to me that I was what I was, I believed the way I did, because that's what he believed. That's when that moment came, and it was nothing more than a thought, but it hit me like a bolt of lightning: "That's not good enough!" I could not survive on my own, living off of my dad's experiences or set of values. I had to have my own personal convictions, my own foundation to stand on, and it had to be solid and stable enough to sustain me during the hard times. His influence has always been, and always will be, a powerful force in my life, but I knew the days of being able to fall back on Daddy's standards were over. Beginning that day, I started studying, digging, thinking, praying, and developing my own belief system...something I could stand on.
It would be inaccurate to say that when that moment came, and my attitude made that sudden shift, that I discarded everything my dad had taught me. In fact, the exact opposite is true: I took the tools and materials he had provided for me, and used them to build my foundation. If someone would ask me to describe in one word what was the most important tool he had left me, I would have to say it is "stability." That's a trait that I want to always hold on to with a death grip, even as I pass it on down to my offspring, so that when the storms are raging and the waves come crashing in, we don't falter or waiver....we just hold steady and stay the course. That doesn't mean that if I ever discover I've made a wrong turn that I'm too stubborn to make a necessary correction. What it means is that I set my eyes on the goal, and let nothing distract me from that focus.
I guess what's got my mind going this direction is the fact that I have recently come in contact with some people who can best be compared to water in a pan. You tilt the pan one way, and they go rushing to one side. Then you shift the pan the other direction, and there they go again. They're here today and gone tomorrow. They're undependable, unpredictable, and the only thing consistent about them is that they're inconsistent. Probably the best way to describe them is that they're a perfect example of what I do not want to become. And the most troubling fact of all is they don't even realize they're that way....if fact, I feel certain that they would argue that they're the exact opposite. Can you think of someone who fits that description?
Just this past week I read a statement that really grabbed my attention: "People who are not strong in their beliefs will most likely adopt the viewpoint of the bully." I want to be the type person who can tell you what I believe and why I believe it, whether the topic be on religion, politics, morality, ethics, or life in general. And if you're going to convince me otherwise, you'd better come armed with some solid facts that you can prove beyond a doubt, or you're just wasting your time. Because, you see, I'm armed with a trait that gives me the courage to set my sails on a bold, steady course, and I don't aim to change. That trait is called "stability." And it all goes back to that day in 1986 when I realized that I had to have my own set of values and beliefs, and I went immediately to work developing them. Here's the neat part: Even though this task of constructing my own solid foundation is a perpetual process, when I take the time to stand back and take a look at it, it looks almost just like my dad's.
Preston
Thursday, July 28, 2011
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Thinking Out Loud, Volume CCLXXX
When a baby is born into an English-speaking home, he will learn to make sounds that babies born in other parts of the world will never learn to make. By the same token, those born in those parts of the world can make sounds that you and I will never have the ability to make. Even if we learn to speak their language, we will be unable to mimic the exact sounds that come so easily to those who learn those languages as small children. Here's the reason: When we are born, our tongues and vocal cords have the potential to make many different sounds, many of which are never needed in speaking certain languages, but when we never use our organs for that purpose, the muscles needed to make those sounds never develop and become useless.
That information is something I picked up in one of my social studies classes in college, and I stored it somewhere way back in one of the tiny crevices of my memory; then last week I was thinking about a totally different topic, and that long hidden piece of knowledge came floating back up to the surface. What was on my mind was how I used to take pride in just how many phone numbers I had stored in my memory bank, and now that smart phones have completely taken over our methods of communication, I don't even know my own kids' phone numbers. There's no longer a need to memorize phone numbers...our phones do it for us. Then my mind went another direction: I've been singing in church since I was knee high to a grasshopper, and at one point in my life, there is no telling how many songs I knew by heart...every word. When we learned a praise chorus or a choir song, we learned it....completely. We didn't look at a book or a cheat sheet, but now that all the words are posted on a screen for everyone to see, I don't have to memorize a song any more. We have two big screens for the congregation to see, and then there's one on the back wall that's there strictly for the singers.
Now don't get me wrong--I'm not complaining. I love the new technology, but if they were to suddenly take away the big screens and the mobile phones, it would not be a problem for me to go back to the way we used to do it, because I developed that part of my brain when I was a little boy. Here's my concern: Will the children born today develop the ability to memorize phone numbers, songs, etc. the way I did? If technology does all that for them, will that be a part of their brain that never develops and ends up becoming useless? I don't know, but I do wonder about it. Every generation gains more knowledge than all the ones before, and I have no doubt that it will continue to be that way. I know there will be so much for them to store in their memory, but I'm not sure that "remembering" and "memorizing" are the same things, and I'm wondering if the "memorizing" part of their brains may never develop the way mine did.
I can still recall the words to more of the old songs than I care to admit, but when we're singing the newer songs, which I love, incidentally, I still have to look at the words. At first I just attributed it to old age, but now that I think about it, I believe it's because I never had to memorize the new ones. One other point: I can't hit the high notes like I used to either, but I still attribute that to old age. All I need now is a new idea that debunks that theory as well.
Preston
That information is something I picked up in one of my social studies classes in college, and I stored it somewhere way back in one of the tiny crevices of my memory; then last week I was thinking about a totally different topic, and that long hidden piece of knowledge came floating back up to the surface. What was on my mind was how I used to take pride in just how many phone numbers I had stored in my memory bank, and now that smart phones have completely taken over our methods of communication, I don't even know my own kids' phone numbers. There's no longer a need to memorize phone numbers...our phones do it for us. Then my mind went another direction: I've been singing in church since I was knee high to a grasshopper, and at one point in my life, there is no telling how many songs I knew by heart...every word. When we learned a praise chorus or a choir song, we learned it....completely. We didn't look at a book or a cheat sheet, but now that all the words are posted on a screen for everyone to see, I don't have to memorize a song any more. We have two big screens for the congregation to see, and then there's one on the back wall that's there strictly for the singers.
Now don't get me wrong--I'm not complaining. I love the new technology, but if they were to suddenly take away the big screens and the mobile phones, it would not be a problem for me to go back to the way we used to do it, because I developed that part of my brain when I was a little boy. Here's my concern: Will the children born today develop the ability to memorize phone numbers, songs, etc. the way I did? If technology does all that for them, will that be a part of their brain that never develops and ends up becoming useless? I don't know, but I do wonder about it. Every generation gains more knowledge than all the ones before, and I have no doubt that it will continue to be that way. I know there will be so much for them to store in their memory, but I'm not sure that "remembering" and "memorizing" are the same things, and I'm wondering if the "memorizing" part of their brains may never develop the way mine did.
I can still recall the words to more of the old songs than I care to admit, but when we're singing the newer songs, which I love, incidentally, I still have to look at the words. At first I just attributed it to old age, but now that I think about it, I believe it's because I never had to memorize the new ones. One other point: I can't hit the high notes like I used to either, but I still attribute that to old age. All I need now is a new idea that debunks that theory as well.
Preston
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Thinking Out Loud, Volume CCLXXIX
Okay, so this may be a biased opinion, but Lake, my little grandson, made a statement that I thought was a pretty good observation for a five year old. He said, "I wish I was an adult. All kids want to be adults and all adults want to be kids." Of course I could've explained to him that adults have now been both and they've figured out that being a kid is better, but I don't think he would've agreed at that point. But doesn't that make sense? People in general never seem to be quite satisfied with where they are at any given point in life, and I guess I'm the same way. I'm definitely not the first person to ever say this, but I would like to take the wisdom I've acquired in the last sixty years and transfer it to a twenty-four year old body. But just like everyone else, I have to make do with what I am right now.
That leads me to ask this question, "Is there a perfect age?" If it was possible for kids to move up to the age they really want to be, and older people could move down to the age they prefer, where would they settle? It stands to reason that if children don't feel that they're old enough, and adults feel that they're too old, there must me an age somewhere in the middle where everyone would be happy. I think I know where the answer lies, but I haven't figured out a method of acquiring that knowledge. So I'll present it to you today, and see if you can help me come up with an answer.
In my few short years on this earth, I've attended funerals for two year olds and ninety-five year olds, and everywhere in between....people who get to experience Heaven before I do. I have, however, read considerably about Heaven, and one thing I've learned is that people who are there will never grow old, although the majority of the people who go there are old before they go. But what about when they get there? The way I see it, they won't be old any more. That leads me to believe that everyone in Heaven is the same age. So now, your homework assignment for today is to devise a formula that can be used to calculate the age of everyone in Heaven. When we come up with that answer, we'll know what the perfect age is. Hint: Keep in mind that there's a possibility that in Heaven, there may be no such thing as age.
If there is a perfect age for us earthlings, how long does it last? Does it last an entire year? Or would it only last for a minute? Whatever the answer, there's not much we can do about it, because every one of us gets a little older with each passing second, whether we want to or not. The only conclusion I can come up with is that the perfect age for Lake at this point in his life is five. The age I am now is just right for me. Tomorrow I need to be one day older. That will be perfect.
Preston
That leads me to ask this question, "Is there a perfect age?" If it was possible for kids to move up to the age they really want to be, and older people could move down to the age they prefer, where would they settle? It stands to reason that if children don't feel that they're old enough, and adults feel that they're too old, there must me an age somewhere in the middle where everyone would be happy. I think I know where the answer lies, but I haven't figured out a method of acquiring that knowledge. So I'll present it to you today, and see if you can help me come up with an answer.
In my few short years on this earth, I've attended funerals for two year olds and ninety-five year olds, and everywhere in between....people who get to experience Heaven before I do. I have, however, read considerably about Heaven, and one thing I've learned is that people who are there will never grow old, although the majority of the people who go there are old before they go. But what about when they get there? The way I see it, they won't be old any more. That leads me to believe that everyone in Heaven is the same age. So now, your homework assignment for today is to devise a formula that can be used to calculate the age of everyone in Heaven. When we come up with that answer, we'll know what the perfect age is. Hint: Keep in mind that there's a possibility that in Heaven, there may be no such thing as age.
If there is a perfect age for us earthlings, how long does it last? Does it last an entire year? Or would it only last for a minute? Whatever the answer, there's not much we can do about it, because every one of us gets a little older with each passing second, whether we want to or not. The only conclusion I can come up with is that the perfect age for Lake at this point in his life is five. The age I am now is just right for me. Tomorrow I need to be one day older. That will be perfect.
Preston
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
Thinking Out Loud, Volume CCLXXVIII
There may be a day when I'll count it as a success that I'm able to walk to the mailbox. I wonder if I'll still be blogging then. You may be reading some high drama account of how I braved a slippery driveway to bring my trash can back away from the street. It may sound a little humorous, but it is a distinct possibility. Overall, I'm an optimistic person, a positive thinker, yet I must admit that I've given some thought to what my mental outlook will be if I ever reach the stage in life where I will be basically immobile. It's a little depressing thinking about it, but I believe I will be better prepared if I have a plan of action to keep myself in a positive state of mind if and when that day ever comes.
I must never stop dreaming. Unless I live to be more than 120 years old, the majority of my life is already behind me, yet I still have so much that I want to accomplish, so many places I still want to go, and so many marathons that I still want to run. There's no doubt about the fact that eventually I will have to scale back some of these challenges, but I never want to reach the point in life where all of my personal ambition is gone and I have no goals that I still want to achieve. Even if I have to endure a little ridicule about how slowly I move and how long it takes me to complete my task, it will be worth it all when I can ask this simple question, "How many other people my age do you see who are even attempting to do what I've just done?"
The reason for writing those first two paragraphs is to make sure you are aware of where I stand regarding my own personal dreams and goals when you read the rest of what I have to say. So let me emphatically declare one more time, "As long as I have breath in my body, I will NEVER stop dreaming about at least one more challenge that I (me, myself) want to conquer. But something else occurred to me a few days ago that I gave a token amount of consideration, then one of my good friends, Nicole Dray, made a simple statement that brought it back to my mind like a torrent. She said, "When your children's dreams come true, yours do too." I guess I was amazed that I had just been thinking almost the same identical thing, and Nicole worded it so well. Thank you so much, Nicole. I'm pretty sure I know why you said it, and congratulations are in order!
I'm absolutely sure why my mind was on that topic. I have two kids, a daughter and a son, and both of them are seeing dreams fulfilled at the same time. My son set sales goals high enough to win a trip to an exotic island for he and his wife, and for the second year in a row, he has achieved that dream. For years my daughter has dreamed of a career that she would love to pursue, but it's a dream that comes with a price. She has now paid that price, and at exactly the same time that my son will be living it up in the Caribbean, she will be graduating with the degree for which she has so long dreamed, with a lucrative job already in the bag. And Mom and Dad feel like we've just won the lottery!
If you have kids, you'll understand what I'm talking about, but there's a little more to it than that. You see, a long time ago, when our kids were tiny babies, Angie and I dreamed of preparing them to make something of themselves, and part of our sense of pride is seeing those dreams come true. What we've learned in the process, however, is that by teaching our kids to dream, we have multiplied our own dreams. She and I both still have our own individual goals that we are working hard to accomplish, yet now that our kids know how to dream and how to pursue those dreams, that's where we've directed our major focus. It's not about us anymore.
Preston
I must never stop dreaming. Unless I live to be more than 120 years old, the majority of my life is already behind me, yet I still have so much that I want to accomplish, so many places I still want to go, and so many marathons that I still want to run. There's no doubt about the fact that eventually I will have to scale back some of these challenges, but I never want to reach the point in life where all of my personal ambition is gone and I have no goals that I still want to achieve. Even if I have to endure a little ridicule about how slowly I move and how long it takes me to complete my task, it will be worth it all when I can ask this simple question, "How many other people my age do you see who are even attempting to do what I've just done?"
The reason for writing those first two paragraphs is to make sure you are aware of where I stand regarding my own personal dreams and goals when you read the rest of what I have to say. So let me emphatically declare one more time, "As long as I have breath in my body, I will NEVER stop dreaming about at least one more challenge that I (me, myself) want to conquer. But something else occurred to me a few days ago that I gave a token amount of consideration, then one of my good friends, Nicole Dray, made a simple statement that brought it back to my mind like a torrent. She said, "When your children's dreams come true, yours do too." I guess I was amazed that I had just been thinking almost the same identical thing, and Nicole worded it so well. Thank you so much, Nicole. I'm pretty sure I know why you said it, and congratulations are in order!
I'm absolutely sure why my mind was on that topic. I have two kids, a daughter and a son, and both of them are seeing dreams fulfilled at the same time. My son set sales goals high enough to win a trip to an exotic island for he and his wife, and for the second year in a row, he has achieved that dream. For years my daughter has dreamed of a career that she would love to pursue, but it's a dream that comes with a price. She has now paid that price, and at exactly the same time that my son will be living it up in the Caribbean, she will be graduating with the degree for which she has so long dreamed, with a lucrative job already in the bag. And Mom and Dad feel like we've just won the lottery!
If you have kids, you'll understand what I'm talking about, but there's a little more to it than that. You see, a long time ago, when our kids were tiny babies, Angie and I dreamed of preparing them to make something of themselves, and part of our sense of pride is seeing those dreams come true. What we've learned in the process, however, is that by teaching our kids to dream, we have multiplied our own dreams. She and I both still have our own individual goals that we are working hard to accomplish, yet now that our kids know how to dream and how to pursue those dreams, that's where we've directed our major focus. It's not about us anymore.
Preston
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