Thinking Out Loud, Volume CDLIII

Today's topic is.....well....uh...okay, it's a man's perspective about a certain part of the female anatomy. Do I now have your attention? If you will read all the way to the end before you write me off as a dirty old man, you'll understand more clearly my reasons for discussing this subject. My goal is to be as brutally honest and as directly to the point as possible. Here goes: No doubt, when a little girl is about to the age to where she begins to change from a girl to a woman, she looks in the mirror every day, watching for some little bumps to appear on her chest. In a public setting, we usually refer to them as breasts, although we have an almost endless supply of other names for them, such as boobs, tits, hooters, etc. There have been times when I've seen an individual with long hair, and at first it was difficult to determine if it was male or female, so I looked to see if there were some boobs present. Every woman wants them, and every man loves them. Women want it to be evident that they're there under their clothing, yet the actual breasts are extremely personal, to the point that they are kept hidden from everyone except their husbands. We can discuss breasts in general with anyone, like I'm doing now, but we're not supposed to mention any individual woman's breasts, due to their personal nature. For example, I can say, "I like that dress you're wearing," or "You have beautiful hair," or maybe even, "Your skin tone is gorgeous," but it would not be appropriate for me to say, "Hey, nice boobs." They're a beautiful part of a woman, and they're as varied in appearance as the women are themselves. Some women have had surgical procedures to make them bigger, while others have had breast reduction operations, although I'm not aware of any situations where breast size kept any young lady from attracting a mate. However, we men do appreciate women who try hard to make themselves as beautiful as possible, and breasts are definitely a part of that equation. Now to my point: There's one aspect on this topic that I find alarming! I've already mentioned the extremely personal and private nature of women's breasts, but there is becoming a much too frequent occurrence when individual women's breasts are becoming a topic of conversation of everyone who knows her, and it appears to be especially prevalent in Northeast Louisiana, where I live. What self respecting lady wants her breasts to be discussed in the living rooms of all her neighbors? But that's exactly what happens when a woman hears that dreadful news, "You have breast cancer." Suddenly that part of her that adds so much to her attractiveness and beauty becomes a source of distress, anguish and fear. She then begins to worry that in the eyes of those around her, she will seem less feminine and will be missing part of what makes her a woman. We men don't see it that way. We're distressed to hear the news, and all we want is for you to get well, whatever it takes. I can name several women who have come through that awful ordeal with such courage and grace that I actually end up having a higher opinion of them. We hate it for you when you have to have one of your "girls" removed, but it can be replaced with a new one that looks just as good. Yes, ladies, I admit, we LIKE your boobs, but we LOVE you, and we just want you well. Believe me....we're on your side on this one. Preston

Thinking Out Loud, Volume CDLII

At what point should a person say, "Okay, this part of my life is over?" I can remember famous athletes who decided to retire while they were still at the top of their game, while others stayed on well past their prime, literally to the point to where they rarely saw any action. Which one made the most wise decision? Maybe that answer depends on each individual's frame of mind and his ability to face reality. A few weeks ago as I turned on the TV and started flipping channels, I landed on a station where a very popular singer of the late 60s and early 70s was performing. Since that's my era and I knew most of the songs he used to sing, I stopped to listen. I'm not sure how old he is now, but since he was already big when I was in high school, I assume he's a few years older than I am. He was doing one of his old hits, but when he reached the part of the song where there are some high notes, his voice cracked and he went a little flat. Been there and done that! I really felt bad for him, but I also thought, "Hey man, it's time to face facts and let it go." As I think about a person's ability to face reality, I realize all of us will reach the point where we'll have no choice in the matter. We'll face it whether we want to or not. The question is, will we make the decision on our own as to when it happens, or will we wait for others to tell us. It seems to me that there are really no good options there, yet I'd rather decide for myself than to wait for another person to point it out to me....assuming I'll still have all my mental facilities. I've recently had to face one of those realities in my life, but for now, most of those decisions are still ahead of me. When will I have to retire? When it's time for me to stop driving, will I be able to make that decision, or will someone else do it for me? It's known as the cycle of life. We're all here on a temporary basis because aging is a natural process, and no amount of Botox or hair dye can stop it. I'm doing my best to stay fit and healthy, yet for you, me, and everybody else, the clock keeps ticking and the time of those decisions is rushing toward us. As for me, I feel that my best bet is to keep an open mind and always be ready to look reality square in the face, because if I don't, someone else will. Preston

Thinking Out Loud, Volume CDLI

In my line of work I have to have several suitcases to use for my samples. I don't know if you've priced luggage lately, but what I've seen is ridiculous! My frustration has caused me to go against my own philosophy, and not practice what I have preached. I've violated my principles and gone to the big discount stores to try to save a few bucks, but even there the prices are outrageous, and I consider myself lucky if they last through two seasons without a broken zipper, messed-up wheels, or a handle that's stuck either open or closed. I was complaining about it to one of my clients, and he reminded me about something I already knew: I come out cheaper in the long run if I go with better quality; so when I bought my next one, I paid more than double what I had been paying, and went with LL Bean, and bought a suitcase that's guaranteed for life. The difference in the way it handles, the quality of the zipper, and the overall appearance of the item is very noticeable. In the past few years, I have developed an appreciation for quality that I didn't have as a younger man. Before, I went by how an item looked on the rack. For instance, in the store, the difference in the quality of two shirts may not be as apparent as it is once they've been worn and washed a couple times. When they're hanging on the rack, we don't see the collar not laying flat, the buttons not staying buttoned, the color running, or the holes that just appear in the fabric. That cheap belt hanging on the rack may look nice, and the label may even say "Genuine Leather," but in most cases the actual leather is as thin as paper, and will crack and peel after it has been worn three or four times. I'm well aware of the temptation to head to the big discount store when finances are tight, but it's the worst thing a person can do. I've often thought about how poor people end up paying more than their more affluent neighbors pay for most things. The affluent pay their utility bills on time and avoid late charges. The affluent pay the entire balance on their credit cards every month and avoid big interest charges. The affluent put better tires on their cars and get more mileage from them. The affluent put better faucets on their sinks, and never have to replace them. The affluent buy better clothes that look good longer and last longer, cutting back on how often they have to buy new ones. There are a lot of stores that sell quality brands at reduced prices. The way they do it is by purchasing last years styles from the manufacturers, but they still look good and the quality is still there. Also, the regular stores will often have some great buys at the end of a season if the regular prices are unaffordable. Just like most everyone, I prefer buying quality, but I had a temporary mental lapse when I was constantly having to purchase new luggage. I've now recovered my senses and started buying quality again, and I remember that always buying the cheapest of anything will NOT save me money. Preston

Thinking Out Loud, Volume CDXLIX

Some days I feel good....like I'm on top of the world. Then there are days when I feel like the world is on top of me and I'm nothing but a loser. I must say though that when it seems like everything I do is wrong, all I have to do is look at my two kids and I have to admit that I did some things right. I often think back to the days before our kids came along and marvel at how different our lifestyle was then, compared to the way it became once we became parents. When I see young couples who are expecting their first child, I say to myself, "Their whole world is about to change." One of the first things people usually mention when a new baby appears on the scene is the loss of freedom, and that is definitely a factor, but as far as I'm concerned, the positives drastically outweigh the negatives. There is no doubt in my mind that I'm a better man today because of my kids. I'll never forget that day when our first one was born and how suddenly my entire mindset changed. I became a more careful driver, because of such fragile, precious cargo. I became more aware of my actions and the things I say, because there were some little eyes watching and some little ears hearing everything I did and said. The weight of the awesome responsibility I had suddenly made itself known as I realized it was up to me which direction this new little life would take, and it would be determined more by the way I lived than by the words I spoke. Would my kids grow up serving God and loving their fellow man? I could've preached that to them every day of their lives, but until they saw me practicing what I preached, it would've had little impact on them. The interaction between their mother and myself was, in their minds, the norm. The way Charlie saw me treating his mother was the only example he had as to how to treat his wife. Valerie grew up expecting her husband to treat her the same way I treated her mother. When Charlie was a little boy, I would take him to big sporting events, and I spent a lot of time with him playing ball, etc., and it warms my heart when I now see him doing the same with his son. I'll never forget a note Valerie wrote to her mother one day, saying she wanted to take piano lessons, because she wanted to sing and play like her daddy. (How is it that I taught Charlie to play golf and Valerie to sing, and both of them are now so much better than I am?) There's a level of love that can't be explained when a new baby is added to a family. There's a reason I chose today as the day to write on this topic. I've already told you how Angie's and my world was rocked and how drastically our lives changed for the better when we became parents, and today, January 2, 2015, is a special anniversary of this event. For Angie and me, our lives were forever transformed, forty years ago today, with the birth of our first child. Happy birthday, Valerie! I am so proud of the woman you have become. You are beautiful both inside and out. It makes me so happy to see your walk with God, and your heart for the disadvantaged is almost beyond comparison. I love you in a way that only a daddy can love his little girl. This is going to be a big year for you and JC. Love, Dad. Preston