Thinking Out Loud, Volume CCCLXXII

I looked down and to my right, and there it was, nestled in among some trees, between two big mountains, barely visible from the road. It was not what you would call a pretty house...in fact, it was an old, "worn-out" looking mobile home. But to someone, it was home. I guess it would be accurate to say that since it was between the mountains, it was in a valley. My GPS system in my car shows elevation, and about the time I noticed that modest abode down deep in that valley, I also made a mental note of my elevation...1,721 feet above sea level. The road I was on curved around to the right as I made my descent down the side of the mountain, and in a few minutes I passed directly in front of that home, so I checked my elevation again...1,296 feet. "Yes," I thought, "that's definitely a valley." Then my thoughts went back to my own home. I live about a half mile from the Ouachita River, and the street that runs parallel with the river is at 84 feet above sea level, and from that point up to where I live there is a steady, gradual incline until it gets to my house, which is at 96 feet above sea level. But I don't live in a valley. The home I saw in the valley is at an elevation that is exactly 1500 feet higher than mine, and I'm not in a valley. How can that be? As far back as I can remember, I've heard it said that life is a series of mountain-tops and valleys, but now I'd like to go back give that old cliche' a little more thought. Can the word "valley" be a relative term? If our mountains and valleys are anything like the comparison between the old mobile home I saw among the mountains of Northwest Arkansas and my house, I think maybe it is. Maybe we consider ourselves to be in a valley simply because we're comparing our situations with what we perceive those of the people surrounding us to be. Sometimes I think life has given me a bag of lemons when, in reality, there are multiplied millions of other people on this earth who would give anything to be in my situation. I've never actually sat down and watched an episode of "Survivor," but if I understand it correctly, they take a group of Americans and put them on a remote island somewhere to see if they can make it there. How do they do it? We worry about how they will be able to survive on an island where natives have been living happily for generations. Such drama! I understand that it's natural for us to constantly strive to make our lives better and raise our standard of living. I do the same thing. But why is it that we have a tendency to only compare ourselves with those who appear to have better lives than we do? That can become depressing. Why do we compare ourselves with anyone else? (Check out 2 Corinthians, Chapter 10, to see what the Bible says about people who do that. It's not very flattering.) I believe the majority of the problems we have with our valley experiences are primarily in that little space between our ears. They will become much more easy to deal with when we figure out that to someone else, our valleys may look like mountain tops. Preston

Thinking Out Loud, Volume CCCLXXI

love Leslie Lamb. Over the past year or so, since she and I are both regulars at the Corner Coffee House (yes, the same one you've seen on Duck Dynasty), I've had the privilege of becoming acquainted with this lovely young lady, and I'm happy to report, she is now my friend. In addition to her beauty and charm, Leslie has a God-given quality that attracts people to her, and she is using that gift to make a positive difference in the lives of other people. We don't have to look far to see that drug abuse, illicit sex, pregnancies, and even suicides are much too common among the youth of our communities, and Leslie has dedicated her life to getting down in the trenches, not to condemn, but to provide a link to the Hope that so many of our youth feel is out of reach. Not everyone who knows her is aware of the dark road she had to travel to get to where she is today, so I've asked her to share her story with all of us. If you would like to follow her blog, you can go to www.lesliealamb.com and sign up to automatically receive them, or you can go to Teen Christian Ministries, the ministry that she helped found, by clicking on www.tcmlive.com . And now, I would like to introduce you to my good friend, Leslie Lamb. Preston Here's Leslie: I am fond of saying that God doesn’t waste any hurt, and sometimes it is the greatest pain that you experience in life that drives the passion to make a difference. I know it is so with me. It all began with my first wail of life into a family that loved me and cared for me. I was lucky. My parents had hearts for God and a desire to lead people to the Lord and go places that others weren’t willing. One such place was South Korea, and we moved there as a missionary family when I was just shy of six years old. Growing up in another country was difficult, but I loved it. It didn’t take long for my memories of America as my homeland to be replaced with magnificent mountain views and an Asian landscape. I was a foreigner in their land, but I didn’t seem to mind. I loved them, and I loved the land we called home. Some of my favorite years, though very much isolated, was the time that I had to be homeschooled and got to live and experience life with my Korean friends like never before… learning their culture, entrenched in their lives, and respecting their customs. As much as I loved being with them, I could not escape the fact that as much as I wanted to be, I was not like them. So, when I was in seventh grade, my parents made the heart-wrenching decision that I should go to boarding school. I didn’t mind. I liked the idea of making more, English-speaking friends, and I saw it as little more than a new adventure! Much of what boarding school brought me wasn’t great. In fact, much of it was painful and depressing, but I was good at pretending so no one really knew. It was best that way. No one else would get hurt. It was that kind of thinking that led me to decide one dark and desperate night when I was seventeen that they would all be better off without me. I remember it like it was yesterday, blade in hand, research done to know exactly where to make a lethal cut, and a plan to make it as clean as possible. It almost seems ridiculous that much of my suicide planning had been about not causing trauma in those that would come upon my dead body after. It is because of this that I disagree with people that say that suicide is selfish. I really thought I was doing them a favor, no matter my own pain and trauma. This is part of the lie of the enemy though, and he is good at deceiving desperate, hurting souls. Luckily, God used that moment in my life to speak to me. First with a picture of a young girl’s face and then with the words, “For her.” God’s language to us is rich and full of meaning. It was clear to me that I was not allowed to take my life. I was not allowed to destroy God’s plan and His purpose, and His power was felt! I remember trembling and putting down the razorblade, afraid and ashamed, I walked back to my dorm room and crumbled. God’s words echoed in my head jumbled with the voice of my enemy telling me I was a failure. I’d like to say that it was all gravy after that, but it was more like a vertical incline on a rock wall with barely a fingernail grip. But, He climbed with me – through the dark anger and depression and pain that had spiraled me down the pit of self-destruction to begin with. All the while, He promised me that He wouldn’t leave my side and He would bring purpose from my life. And He has. The words “For Her” have flavored my life and passionately drive me to make a difference for her, any her, who finds herself hurting and rejected and depressed with no hope. It is for her that I write stories that she can relate to and will give her the encouragement to push through to the other side. It is for her (and for him) that my friends and I started Teen Christian Ministries in order to reach out and empower teenagers to live for Christ and not be afraid to live out Love. It is for Christ, despite the battle I still fight from time to time with depression, that I strive to shine and make a difference. Twenty years ago He saved my life, and because of Him I have the opportunity to speak Life into others. That’s a privilege that I don’t take lightly, a purpose for my pain that I never expected but He faithfully promised. Leslie

Thinking Out Loud, Volume CCCLXX

I know my family loves me, so this request is not directed at any of them, other than to make them aware of my situation and to ask them to be vigilant as they observe those who will be caring for me if I ever reach the point in life where I cannot take care of myself. There's a part of me that I cannot live without, and if it's taken from me, I'm a goner. Sure, I'm enough of a realist to realize that a portion of it will have to be removed, and that I can handle, but if I lose all of it, I won't make it. Actually, I have several "vital" organs, but I'm referring to something a little more intangible. On a more positive note, a person would have to work extremely hard to take it all away. I'm talking about my dignity. Throughout history, there have been some evil individuals who have figured out how extremely important a person's dignity is to his well-being, and they have devised some wicked schemes to try to take it away. I read about one American airman who ended up in a Japanese POW camp during World War II, and the only privy in his cell was a hole in the floor, creating a stench that was almost unbearable. He had to sleep on the floor, and when he slept, he would move to the part of the room that was farthest away from the privy, until his guard figured out what he was doing. He was then severely beaten and forced to sleep with his head right next to the privy from then on. I also read about some of the Jews who were rounded up by Nazi Germany who had to remove all the grass from the cracks in the sidewalk...with their teeth. Many of them were stripped completely naked and herded onto a train in box cars or cattle cars; men, women, and children of all ages mixed together. The evil men who perpetrated those horrible acts knew that the best way to break a person's will is to rob him of his dignity. The definition of dignity is "self respect or a feeling of self worth." When that's gone, there's nothing left. I believe it is a natural reflex of any human to desperately cling to that last shred of dignity until he takes his last breath. I don't think I know anyone who would purposely attempt to steal an elderly person's dignity, but I've met some who may have a tendency to go about the mechanics of their job without stopping to consider how vital a person's dignity is to their survival. On the other hand, I also believe that there are many people who feel that it is their calling to help care for the helpless. I thank God for them. I'm thankful for the lady that cared for and loved (Yes, I said "loved.") my mom during her final days. I pray that God reserves a special blessing for every individual who has dedicated his/her life to care for those who can't care for themselves. Chances are, either I, my spouse, or some other family member will one day need that type of care, and when that day comes, I pray that we will be cared for by one of these "angels on earth" who lives by the Golden Rule: "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." Preston

Thinking Out Loud, Volume CCCLXIX

My friend, Monty, performed the experiment on our little group of friends as we sat around talking in the lobby of a Hampton Inn in Arlington, Virginia. Here's how it worked: We had to close our eyes and stretch our arms out in front of us, side by side, with our palms facing upward. We then had to imagine that he was actually doing what he said. The first thing he told us was that he was placing a feather in our left hands. Next he said, "I am now placing a bowling ball in your right hand. I will now stack a second bowling ball on top of the one I just placed in your right hand. Now open your eyes." When we opened our eyes, our right hands were much lower than our our left hands, although they were empty. The experiment was to see how much our minds affected our actions, even when we didn't realize it. If you really start looking at it, you will be amazed at how our minds can affect our physical appearance, and even our health. My wife was telling me that she had read about a study that proved that. It said that a person who is generally happy will have lines coming from the corners of his eyes, a person who is a worrier will have creases on his brow, and a person with an inferiority complex will likely have stooped shoulders. Therefore, an individual who is trained in that field can tell what kind of person someone is just by looking at him. Practically anyone who runs as many miles as I do will testify to the fact that our sport (most any sport) is as much mental as it is physical. When I reach the halfway point of a full marathon, I'm usually still feeling pretty good, but if I'm only running a half marathon, I'll start feeling wiped out by the time I reach mile ten. If we start out with negative feelings about the run, it will not be a pleasant run. On the other hand, if I begin with a positive attitude, chances are I'll have a much better run. That same principle holds true in practically every aspect of our lives. I understand that it's easier said than done when it comes to maintaining control of our attitudes, especially during times of stress or distress, but it can be done. The trick I use is when those old negative thoughts and attitudes try to force their way in, I treat them like useless waste and flush them, replacing them with positive thoughts. I have enough confidence in myself that if someone else has won this battle, then I can too. In fact, it's a good idea to find testimonials of people who have fought and won the same battles you're fighting. They will tell you that they went through some tough times, but they never gave up hope and they never quit trying. This is true with health issues, family issues, financial hardships, occupational problems, or just about any other issue that I'm not thinking of right now. Whatever our challenge may be, half the battle is in our minds. When we win that part of the battle, we're well on the road to victory. Preston