Thinking Out Loud, Volume CCLXXVII

When I recently crossed paths with an old friend that I haven't seen in quite a while, he asked, "So what's been going on in your life?" I gave him a general overview of the direction my life has taken in the past several years, but after he and I had parted, I thought more about the question he had asked me, and I decided to relate to you some things that have been going on...things of which most of you are probably unaware. Angie and I have learned some lessons, and I would like to share some of what we've learned...some things that have given us a new outlook on life.

I often refer to Angie, my wife, as a "private citizen." What I mean by that is when she's facing a problem or a situation in life, she is not the type to share it with the world. In other words, she likes to keep her private life private. I totally understand, because I'm basically the same way. After some discussion with her however, we have decided that we will share some of what's been going on in the Davidson household in the last few months. Hopefully, I will be able to persuade her to give her side of the story in the near future as well, so you can also hear it from her perspective.

A couple months ago she and I volunteered to head up and coordinate a cookout for our LifeFocus class to be held at Kiroli Park. We did it, and I believe everyone who attended had a great time, but that particular weekend was especially stressful for us for more reasons than just having a cookout. I'll explain later why I feel that class outing plays a part in this story. At about the same time that we volunteered to take on that particular project, Angie was having some medical issues that just didn't seem to be getting any better, so she was going through a series of tests to try to find out what was causing her discomfort. When it turned out not to be what we thought it was, an x-ray was ordered, mainly to check her gall bladder. When our doctor checked the results, he called her and said, "Your gall bladder looks good, but I can see something in there that needs to be checked out. There's a spot on your pancreas." Well, that wasn't good news, to say the least. He ordered a CT scan so he could get a better look, and when those results came back, sure enough, there it was. He then referred us to a doctor in Shreveport, a specialist who could go in, take a look, and let us know for sure what was going on. When we went to see him for our initial visit before the actual procedure, he told us that, based on what he had seen, we should go ahead and plan on surgery. He then said, "Whatever I find in there will be sent off for a biopsy, but I do this all the time, and I'll know right away if it's cancer...and I'll tell you what I see." Then when the name "M.D. Anderson Hospital" in Houston was mentioned, it sent chills up our spines.

The procedure was scheduled for early Monday morning, less than a week after that initial visit, and it was also the morning after our class outing. I really believe that having the responsibility of overseeing the cookout was helpful for us that weekend, because it kept our minds occupied. Through all of this, the only person other than immediate family who knew the whole story was Angie's boss, who is a surgeon. Without mentioning her specific needs, Angie went down front for prayer a couple times at church, and I believe her faith was strong due to some events earlier in her life that had worked to increase her faith. I should also add that there is a scripture that I kept quoting to myself that gave me strength. It is Matthew 6:27: "Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?" Most of you will remember less than a month ago, Jansen Martinez wrote for me telling her story of how she lost her twin babies, and has since been restored another set of twins, a boy and a girl, the same that she had lost. (The odds of that happening are 3 in 10,000.) Jansen had relayed her story to us the day before Angie's procedure, and it was while I was sitting alone in the waiting room, during the time they were working on her, that I contacted Jansen asking her to share her experiences. I know her story helped a lot of people, but it was perfectly timed for us as a gigantic faith builder.

I must admit that I was really stressed that morning as I sat there in that hospital, but when they called my name and told me the doctor wanted to visit with me, I felt a peace and a calmness that I had not felt in weeks. He went straight to the point: "Well, there's no mass. I checked every square inch of her pancreas, and there's nothing there. It looks good." I could tell by the doctor's demeanor that he was really enjoying giving us that information. All we could say was, "Thank you God!!"

While our report turned out good, we were fully aware that there are just as many people whose news is the opposite. I'm not sure how I would've reacted if what we heard had been different. What would our drive home been like that day? What would we have said to each other? More than likely some of you know from experience what it's like to hear a bad report. I know from exerience that on that one and a half hour drive back home, the things that we had complained and worried about in the past weren't so important any more. We're not sure what that spot on the x-ray was all about...in fact, we may never know. What we do know is that Angie's pancreas looks good, and she is feeling better day by day. For that we are grateful! May the rest of our days be filled with thanksgiving.

Preston