Thinking Out Loud, Volume CDXCII

My five year old granddaughter, Lennon, does not like to hold my hand when we are crossing the street or walking across a busy shopping center parking lot, but with her tendency to just take off running without regard to traffic, it's something I insist on. Yesterday, however, was a different story. Angie and I had gone to watch her big brother, Lake, in his soccer game. When the game was over and we were all walking back to the car, she wanted Angie and me both to hold her hand. We figured out the reason really quickly...she wanted to go home with us. There was an ulterior motive behind her sweetness to us. It makes me feel good that she enjoys going to our house, but I also had to wonder if the art of "buttering us up" is a natural tendency or is it learned behavior? I thought it was cute the way she tried to play us, but there are times when adults try the same tricks, and that is NOT cute. Do you ever feel like you have "friends"who try to flatter you strictly in an effort to fulfill their own selfish desires? I will admit there have been times when I was gullible and fell for it hook, line, and sinker. It didn't take me long to become wise to their intentions, though, and then it just made me angry. I have received calls from people I haven't heard from in years, and the first thing I hear is how I have been on their mind lately, and they just wanted to call to let me know how much I mean to them.....oh, and also, as it turns out, they would also like some of my money in the form of a donation or some business proposition in which they would greatly benefit. If it's a business call, just let me know and we can go from there, but trying to "sweet talk" me first only makes me mad. I remember one time when I worked in retail, a young man walked into my store and asked me to remind him of the man's name who worked in the shoe department. I told him it was Jim, and he went back there and started talking to Jim like they were long lost best friends. Eventually he got around to asking Jim to co-sign on a car loan. Jim laughed in his face. It was Abraham Lincoln who said, "You can fool all of the people some of the time, and you can fool some of the people all the time, but you cannot fool all the people all the time." Being friends is a two way street. There has to be give and take on both sides, but in true friendships, what's in the best interest of the other person is always a factor in every decision you make in regards to the two of you. When it's not like that, the other party figures it out in a hurry. One of the most annoying things I face is when I realize someone is attempting to disrupt my life solely for their own benefit. That type of friendship is short lived. Let's make a deal. If I decide in our friendship, you're the sole beneficiary, I will walk away; and you do the same with me. You see, true friends love each other, and when that's the case, what works best for me cannot be my only consideration. Friends don't have an "it's all about me" attitude. Instead, it's more of an "it's about us" frame of mind, which requires each person to truly consider the needs and desires of their friends. I have friends who genuinely regard my best interest, and I do the same for them. Those are the keepers. Preston